Tonight I’m thinking about Jesus
which isn’t remarkable
for most people on Christmas
but it is for me.
Which means that I’m really
thinking about the light
from Seamus Heaney’s phone
when he texted his wife
don’t be afraid seconds before
he left his body behind. Don’t be afraid,
I tell my son as I
buckle his seatbelt, don’t be afraid
I place a green dinosaur
mask on his face,
don’t be afraid, I spray
his toddler hands with
disinfectant don’t be afraid
I hold him close
and walk away from
other mothers singing
their own version of
don’t be afraid
I say it so often
I wonder if my son
thinks the words
are a series
of sounds I hum
when I’m around him
to get through the day
more comfort
than language, more
shape than mouth,
more memory than body,
more mother than person.
—Luisa Muradyan
Luisa Muradyan is the author of American Radiance and the winner of the 2017 Prairie Schooner Book Prize.
